When You Have an Anxiety Disorder, Courage Is Subjective

Nov 4, 3030
By Gina Perkins

“I’m dying. Right here on this sidewalk. Alone. I’m going to die.”

That was the narrative running through my mind during my first panic attack when I was 20 years old. I had been enjoying dinner with my family at an Italian restaurant, when out of nowhere the restaurant started getting darker, and my peripheral vision was blurring. My heart started racing, my hands and feet turned ice cold. My whole body began shaking, and my jaw clenched up and trembled. I couldn’t breathe. I stood up from my seat and hazily made my way out of the restaurant and to that harrowing sidewalk, where my mom found me and drove me to the emergency room.

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